Alyssa shelasky dating
Let's be blunt: When you find out a friend is expecting, you feel excited for her — and if you're being honest, you may also feel a little…betrayed. And no, feeling hurt does not make you evil, because there's no denying things are about to change big-time.It might sound horrible and selfish, but this happy time for her may be a hard one for you. Good-bye, Bloody Mary brunches and impromptu after-work socializing.Maybe this time, she needs you more than you need her.This could be an opportunity to be your most selfless and compassionate self — while bonding over some salted caramel ice cream, of course.She went from being up for anything to wanting to stay home and nest. ), she'd want to talk only about her overtaxed bladder, which I was happy to sympathize with…to a point. "My first thought was 'Why are you opting out of our awesome, fun life together?The few times I did drag her away from the baby-naming books (Aiden! And how can you leave me stranded here, forced to make new friends without even checking with me first?A friend's pregnancy not only can feel like a violation of your friendship pact, but it's also a big hit on one's social life.
"You need time to work through these feelings and find ways to renegotiate the friendship," she adds.
Whether you want kids, have kids, or hate kids, it's good for your friendship — and yourself — to consider the situation from your pregnant friend's point of view.
Her hormones are out of whack, her body is bloated, and if this is her first kid, there's a good chance she's really, really scared.
It could be time to make more friends who share your vision of what a happy life is.
For Melissa P., 32, from San Francisco, who experienced "extreme jealousy and mild rage" over a friend's pregnancy, her reaction prompted her to join three online-dating services to "get the show on the road." That's how she met her husband—and they're now expecting.
"Hopefully, you'll get to a place where you realize that this wasn't a personal assault."Still, the relationship might not look the same when it comes out on the other side.